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<Miranda July><jared - see 1999 Q & A for explanation.> |
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| 3.5.00 P. Martolo asks: Hey, why the hell is that doof ass perpitrator Jared answering all your questions? I think he has a real attitude problem and could use a good whoopin'. I bet all of you people in Olympia-town could use a good whoopin'. And why don't you people cut your hair? Only Godless communists have hair like that and you don't want people to think you are Godless communists now do you? And what's up with this vegetarian thing? Don't you know that the only way to get into heaven is by eating the flesh of one or two different animals each day? I bet you all have sold your souls to the devil. That's what I think. Anyways young Ms. July (if that is your real name), I think you need to start speaking for yourself and kick that crude man out! You can do better! | |
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Sean: Oh you insolent peasant! How dare you speak to your cultural and intellectual superiors in such a manner! Godless communists? We are Gods! We do and say whatever we want and when we do, it is always brilliant! We wear push up bras! We wear converse shoes! We're way better than you!! Bow down before the might and majesty of Olympia! And as for Jared..well, he probably does need a good beating. Jared: The reason I take care of Miranda's questions is because she is very busy and doesn't have time to respond to "what's up with that?", "godless commie", "I'm gonna kick yer ass", "I'm fuckin hilarious, right?!!", blah blah blah. I, on the other hand, am an obnoxious asshole who's job allows me to spend hours thinking up less than truthful responses to questions asked by people who take themselves way to seriously. Hope that helps. |
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| 3.5.00 Anonymous asks: dear miss july and or jared- are you, sending the latest big miss moviola, nest of tens, or some other project around the country without you/her? i ask this because i asked her to come to my university and she sort of dropped the idea. AND now filmmaker stephanie barber said that she got a call from her a couple weeks ago asking stephanie if she would host a screening or something. we aren't sure and maybe you know what this is in regards to.... maybe it has something to do with andrea whatever her last name is as well? i'm not sure. | |
| Jared: This is exactly the kind of gossip that's ruining the independent film scene. | |
| 1.26.00 *****(highly authorized) asks: Dear Miranda, You know beat so well. Someday, I hope to know it as well as you. Oh, and quit fussing over your hair. It looks nice. | |
| Jared: Miranda thanks you for the compliments on her hair, and I agree!! As for the beat, I would suggest you read some of the other, lesser known beat poets of the late 60's: Gary Johnson - "Looking Through Shot Glass Eyes", and Rip Taylor's timeless mastercraft "What's THAT Smell?" | |
| 1.26.00 joellie asks: Dear Miranda July, have you ever read any of Lydia Lunch books or met her? and what do you think of her? Also, have you ever read the book Egalia's Daughters? | |
| Jared: Yes, Miranda and Lydia are real tight and are planning to collaborate on a project called "Lydia and Miranda Do Lunch In July". Get it?!!! Also, the book you mention has been into a major motion picture that I believe is out right now. Look for the always tear jerking Robin Williams in Egalia's Ashes in a theater near you | |
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1.26.00 Rachel asks: Dear Miranda,(or Jared), what is the top secret Jennifer Aniston thing? I read a question pertaining to it on this sight... |
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| Jared: What secret? Everybody know's that Jennifer Aniston is America's sweetheart!!! Shame she has to diet herself to death to be loved though. | |